It's already October! And the first Wednesday of the month means it's Insecure Writer's Support Group time. This month's question:

How do major life events affect your writing? Has writing ever helped you through something?

Such a perfect question seeing as today is my oldest son Sebastian's birthday! And there's no life event like having kids! I mean one minute you're pregnant and the next, they're 9 years old! Seriously how did that happen so fast?

I'd have to say every major life event has affected my writing, often not in the way you might expect. Some of the most terrible events, circumstances, situations, etc., sparked wonderful writing, or at least motivation to write. And conversely, the most wonderful events, like having kids, brought most of my writing to a halt, at least at first. The first couple years of both my boys lives I spent pretty well consumed with them and didn't write much except to vent my new mom frustrations in a diary, or to write a quick blog post about how my baby was growing. But now that they're not babies anymore, having children has spurred all sorts of writing ideas. I'm constantly telling myself to "write that one down" when they come out with they're funny questions, crazy imaginations, and perfectly timed one-liners.

Writing has helped me through more things than I can count. But the biggest and first that comes to mind is my eating disorder recovery, and the seemingly never-ending battle with depression. Especially the depression and grief from Sebastian's NF1 diagnosis when he was 3. Even after living with this knowledge for all these years, it's easy for depression to sneak in if I let my thoughts drift to all the whys and what-ifs that come with a disorder like NF. It hits me when I look at my sweet boy, especially on his birthday, and can't help but still feel some of those "it's just not fair" feelings. But then I remember that I was given the gift of him, and what a beautiful, kind human he is. And that gets me through another day with the hope that somehow it'll all be okay.

And writing, like my family, will always be there to help me get through. Without writing, I honestly don't know where I'd be. Writing gives me sanity when I feel insane. It gives me happiness when I'm down and little else can. It brings me peace when life is full of conflict. Writing always helps me to make sense of things when all seems to be in chaos. Simply put, without writing, life would be a hell of a lot harder. And while this life is unquestionably difficult, it is also full to bursting with beauty, joy, wonder, and laughter. And so we must write about that, too.

July 2011
Photo credit Terry Ortiz

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